I'm looking forward to my BIG Europe trip :)

I've never been to Europe before. I've always dreamt of visiting those places but actually doing it  for real is like WOW.... simply WOW.... The Eiffel Tower, Venice, Amsterdam etc. It feels so surreal.

I just want to immerse myself in the culture , the food , the people. People watching would be sooooo awesome ! Seeing how they interact , how they do things differently  . OHMIGOODNESS THE FOOD! sorry I've not been this excited for a while :)

I hope. During this trip I'll be able to learn a lil more about myself, to let go of some emotional baggage , and I guess to find peace . Not that I'm feeling "at war"" at the mo , but just to find some clarification maybe?

So far , to be honest , I've been having doubts . Doubting the decisions I've made, the relationships and friendships I've made. Doubting the future . Me a wife? Me a mother? My career ?  A lot of "what ifs" really.

But yeah all in all I'm really excited to see the Eiffel Tower. I know a lot of people have been telling me its "just a piece of scrap metal , don't be disappointed " .I don't really care.

The thing is , the Eiffel Tower was like a symbolization of hope to me since I was 17? That was when everything went down hill , and I made this pact with my bestie at the time , that we would visit the Eiffel Tower together. and everything that we do from now on should be towards that cause. The day we visit the Eiffel Tower is when we're not screwed up anymore, we'll have stable jobs, we'll both have loving partners.. basically we'll be at our prime !

But.. Friendships change after being 9 years apart. We've changed. I'm sorry .


Someday..