My dramatic morning

Today I got up for work as usual. Dragged my feet to the kitchen wearing Tim's fluffy tiger slippers *so warm. Tried opening a box of cereal with a knife. and guess what.

I cut myself =.= and it just wouldn't stop bleeding. Blood was just dripping all over the sink, and then I blacked out. Sigh, my body is useless when it comes to pain and blood. A good reason why I didn't do med.

When I got up, slumped on the couch, I called the pharmacy to tell them I was gonna be late. Then the next person I thought of was Tim. I could only manage a text before the next black out. Tim called, and obviously sounded worried, and called the ambulance.

So you know what to expect next. The ambulance ppl came knocking on the door. The first thing they said was " Is there a damsel in distress " in a sarcastic voice. HAHA! Apparently, my cut didn't need stitches, the bleeding stopped (which was good) , and one of the paramedics was telling me that he used to be a butcher and he gets cuts like these all the time. *Thanks man.. I get it. Am I not embarrassed enough?Its not my fault my body reacts like that.

 So yeah, this sums up my very dramatic morning. The peeps at the pharmacy thought it was funny. It is actually if you kinda think of it :) oh well. What can i say?

Wellington ~

Placement has been awesome so far. These are the people that truly inspire me to do better. I've always thought working at the pharmacy was all work and no play, but somehow these people have found the balance :)

*fingers crossed I'll end up in a good pharmacy for intern. and praying it's in Welly. The quaint lil shops, and their uniqueness is simply mind blowing. Am always so tempted to walk into the shops during my deliveries .

Bf's being a gem :) driving me to my work place as early as 7.30 in the morning when he starts at 9 ish. And fetching me at 5 in the evening. He's been super encouraging during the time I was nervous bout the placement which turned out to be an answered prayer. He makes me breakfast too :)

Its super windy here in Welly. but not as cold as Dunners :) Missing the friends at home (yang, bock bock, alia etc) and sis. Oh well, this week I shall persevere . Will keep hunting for a intern site , and also hoping that this pharmacy will accept me as their intern. *fingers double crossed.

Dear 11 year old self

Dear me,

This is your 23 year old self  writing you a letter from the future. You'll be studying in New Zealand, and stuck here for a very long time. umm.... and No. You won't be a doctor, instead you'll be an awesome-pharmacist-to-be , a profession which you grew to love and respect. Don't worry, you'll have a few inner struggles at first, but later in life, you'll know you made the right decision.

Don't worry about being the heavy kid :) You'll slowly lose it as you get older. and when you're my age, you'll finally be in the 50-60 kg range. Don't worry bout the pimples either. Just turn a deaf ear when you're teased about the pus and how red your face looks, cos you'll lose them too when you're 18 :) ooooh ~! and the frizzy hair, you'll be glad to know they invented rebonding , a new straightening technique that lasts for ages :) you wont turn out to be an ugly duckling after all.

You'll do well in high school. You'll be the cocky person but God will teach you to be humble. You'll have a few crushes, but none will like you back. haha! no worries, it gets better :) You'll be the model student, the best in your game, but then you'll go to a different school. You'll start all over again, and slowly climb your way up. You'll be best friends with your main competitor, whom you'll still keep in contact today.She'll also be another great pharmacist-to-be :)

And.. umm. you'll date a guy at 17. You'll be head over heels with this one, that you ignore all the warning signs. You'll get your heart broken at 18 and 19 ( go figure! haha) and you'll take a long time to recover. At this time, you'll be thinking there's no such thing as love.

At 21, this guy will prove you wrong. Nah...it won't be like how you'll imagine yourself meeting prince charming , but BETTER! haha. This one is for keeps :) He pampers you like you'll never imagine (foot rubs, making you tea etc) , he'll slowly patch those pieces back in place, and he's super funny. I won't tell you anymore, cos it'll be a surprise. Lets just say, you'll blush shitless when you see him for the first time (yeap, he's that Hawwwt ) LOL

Oh, and one piece of advice. Appreciate the family while you're still staying under the same roof. You'll miss them terribly when your 23. Don't tell mom about "how stupid housework is" cos you'll be doing a lot of it when you're 22 till now.  Karma babeh! Learn to love yourself a lil more, don't be sucha nerd and HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE ! Don't worry too much about your future, I know you freak out easily. Take one step at a time.

Much love xx

When it rains

Its one of those days 

My dad

My dad.

Was never the one to show weakness. He would be the one least emotional when times get rough , he would be the one to tell us everything was okay (when it was not) , he would be the one to tell us that he'll fix it (even though he couldn't)

And I think that's why, the family always looked up to dad, being the leader of the family and all. He was our pillar of strength in the family. I always thought dad could handle any problem, he was never afraid of anything, no matter how big the problem was.

There were only on 2 occasions I saw dad shed a tear - one, when I was sick during PMR and almost couldn't sit for the exam - second, when I was leaving for NZ .

Mom said on father's day, dad gave a speech in church. I asked dad about what he said but he refused to tell me , which made me even more curious !! Later, mom told me that dad mentioned how proud he was to have 3 daughters , how hard it was for him to let us grow up ( i think this involves having bfs lol ), and how it was painful to see us leaving to NZ. All these years, I've always thought dad as being the non-mushy type. But I guess, dad didn't want us to see that side of him.

My dad.

He's awesome like that.

Charlie and his 3 angels :)

Why girls need girlfriends?

• Life would be dead boring

• To gossip / bitch about your people you dislike or ...  like?

• To be your fashion inspector. Especially if you don't have a good sense of fashion. eg. moi 

• To say to your face " get off your lazy ass and go to the gym" and "jaga" my weight - girls would only tolerate this from their gfs . Not very much from their bfs - bad consequences *smack! ouch! 

• To accompany you when the bf's away :P 

• To share about your multiple crushes (doesn't matter if your attached or not , we all have one :P ) vanness wu ~~~ mmm~~

• To tell you to your face . that you're lame. *yang, you're lame

• Someone you can be annoying too. and not worry about "breaking up" .

• To organize your HENS NIGHT. haha!

• To share gross secrets that no one else knows. 

Girl friends, can't like with them, yet can't live without them 

Growing pains

Sometimes I find it hard to believe I'm 23. Where did all those years go? As you get older, the more is expected out of you. I can no longer turn a blind eye to my problems and let "mummy & daddy" to handle it. I WISH!!

Then again, I guess this is all part and parcel of life.

I laugh at myself sometimes when I'm in the kitchen making dinner. Back then, sis and I would play  "masak-masak" with plastic pots and pans. And now, we're both cooking for real. It doesn't feel as glamorous or fun as back then. Also, when we were younger, we always fought for who will be cooking first. Today - we both fight for whose taking the day off . The irony 


Back then, it was so cool playing with toy cars, and pretending you're the reckless driver. Today- I drive with my eyes glued to my windscreen, searching for hidden cameras and police cars. Again the irony


When we were lil' it was fun to act like an adult , wear mom's high heels, play with her lipstick, pretend to pay the bills, etc. Today - not so. I don't know bout you guys, but choosing something to wear for a big night out, gives me a headache. My high heels give me blisters. And saying bye-bye to your money when paying the bills is definitely no fun. The irony !

And as I get older. I also understand the reason behind certain things my parent's used to tell us or do when we were lil. The reason was simple - to protect their kids. But we didn't understand those things back then.  I've learned to appreciate my parents much more.

As time flies, I realize it'll soon be my turn to take care of my parents. I pray i'll be able to do so, with the same love and care they showed me and my siblings.

I hate goodbyes

I hate good-byes .

Sent mom and sis to the bus stop today. sigh. *sniff

I wish I had the power to reverse time.

Sunny dunedin :)

Me love sun ~

The birthday girl 

Feed me . I'm hungus :(

Secret garden

I heart roses :)

My AWESOME hill

Mmmmm ~ my daily fix

Self explanatory :)

Ps: Post-exams feels AWESOME !!

Women, we're never satisfied

Freedom you taste so good !!

I'm finally done with exams :) Time to relax and unwind  ~

Secret

I secretly love kimonos :)

Or maybe I secretly want to be a geisha :P

Why you should never piss off an asian

Why would you? It'll be like digging your own grave *based on personal experience , both the receiving and giving end.

1. They'll karate chop your friendship . or whatever that's left of it.
2. Asians are like calm waters. You don't know whats lurking underneath.
3. If you give em shit, they'll give you back 10 times more. They multiply everything. eg: look at China
4. Asians are damn smart. sometimes scarily smart. Piss them off, and they could be already planning to take over your business etc .
5. Asians thrive on criticism. So if you're thinking of making them feel bad by calling them names etc. Think again. They could be your future boss.  
6. If they want it, they get it. No questions asked. scary! 

* LOL . Honestly, asians aren't that bad. I just made it up. Well, some of them :P

Killer ninjas

A wonderful surprise

I got up in the morning . Running late for my library meeting with a few friends.  I was about to walk down my hill, and I had the most wonderful surprise :)

This was in the mail :)

and when I opened it 

I FOUND 

A card . Signed: with love, your Timtam

A box with goodies ~ eeek!

Each had a personal note written on them.

It was such a lovely surprise :) LOL. and the most practical one ever. One note read " Since I can buy you mochas, here's some powdered ones to help you study " . Another on a box of Lemon&Ginger teabags     "Some ginger to keep you warm at night" .It's like my first aid kit for exam stress .

To my dearest boyfriend,

You're the best ever. Thank you !! Love you long time. xxx

Someone like you

listening to someone like you by adele  


I heard that you're settled down, 
That you found a guy and you're married now, 
I heard that your dreams came true, 
Guess he gave you things I didn't give to you, 
Old friend, why are you so shy? 
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light



Nevermind, I'll find someone like you, 
I wish nothing but the best for you, too, 
Don't forget me, I beg, 
I remember you said, 
"Sometimes it lasts in love, 
But sometimes it hurts instead," 
Sometimes it lasts in love, 
But sometimes it hurts instead, yeah  


and thinking.

it won't be me singing this song to you. but it'll be the other way round. I'm in a much better place now :) You're selfishness only made me stronger. Enough said.

Exam fever :(

Can't wait to dance like theres no tomorrow.

The old and the new

Sometimes I would like to think life as a bed of roses. Unfortunately.. most often , life does NOT work that way. I get thrown into the most awkward situations, a few toughies , and very weird ones. I guess it's God's way of working on my character. But along the way , I've met the most wonderful individuals whom I'm proud to call my friends :) These people have been my shoulder to cry on, being brutally honest when I'm asking for advice, and having the guts to tell me I'm fat etc.

Although these people come and go.I still remember each and every one of them. They still have their lil influences on me :) I still wear eyeliner each day , I'm still in love with Hindi/Malay songs, I'm less impulsive , and I'm still as dirty-minded as ever.  I still laugh when I have flashbacks of our most stupidest moments in Taylors/Uni/ High School.

I've also learned from this bunch of people to have the courage to speak up, to say no when I want to, to be myself regardless of what others say, to have the courage to try different things, and to make tequilas when life gives you lemons :)

 I miss you guys.

confessions of a banana

Quite frequently, I get asked . Are you Chinese ? Malay? and when I say that I'm Chinese , they get so confused . And when I ask why, I get bombarded with " but....*pause* ... you can't speak Chinese " PHAIL!! oh New Zealand, why are you making this hard for me !!??

Well, this is what happens when your parents never really thought things through. and never thought Chinese as being the main language. And so at home, we speak a mixture of Malay and English , with mom occasionally scolding us in Hakka . 

Maybe thats why I've always been known as the "confused soul ". Being Chinese to me, was always just my skin colour. but never reflecting who I was inside. As a result, (claimed by many ) , I scold in Malay, and I give advice in a very surprising "Indian accent " , which makes me ... Malaysian ? and so, maybe thats why I've got so few Chinese friends. LOL . most of them are "bananas" anyways =.= 

*bananas , a term used when you're yellow in the outside but "white" on the inside. annoying!

Mom and dad now realizing their "mistake" , made many attempts to send me and sis to Chinese classes , and speaking to us in Chinese. All I can say is . even the teachers gave up on us. I had one teacher that was so frustrated with me , that she basically said " You speak Chinese like a kwai-lou (white person) " but hey! that's why my parents are paying you miss grumpy ! 

I know . Some people say it's not too late to learn. Well, easy for them to say. You've been speaking Chinese all your life. Of course you get it! For me , Chinese is like ... a tongue twister. a mumbo-jumbo of words. Why can't Chinese be simple and not having those different sounds which mean different things. and oh .. did I tell you I was tone -deaf ? yeap, that's why I'm never gonna get Chinese. 

And to make matters worse, in New Zealand . They won't believe me when I say English is my first language. They go " NO.... NOOO.... English ..*points at me*.. second language" and they say it like I dont get English. or like I'm retarded. like seriously?? Tho I've got this "amazing" Malaysian accent , doesn't mean I can't speak English dimwit.. 

and in workshops and classes. I don't really contribute much. I'm not much of a speaker. and so. when you don't say anything. They assume you can't speak a word of English . So.. how do you think I do my exams..? I answer in Sanskrit??? Cambodian ??? Thai ???

In Malaysia , my KIND is known as OCBC (yeap after a famous bank, how nice ) . It stands for "orang cina bukan cina " .. translated as " chinese but not chinese" 

Lesson be learned ... in the future, I might as well teach my kids Chinese . 

My Checklist 2012

Checklist :

• Get a great intern site next year. and hopefully a stepping stone to some day being a proud of owner of a pharmacy
• Passing my exams . no... thats not rite.. ACE my exams I mean. (it's good to be a lil kiasu despite putting a lot of pressure on myself)
• Get myself a mutual fund , and learn how to invest my mulah ! oh daddy you'll be so proud : )
• Learn to save. and save... and SAVE !!! and budget  ( yes , i've already started saving for my retirement. have you ? )
• Learn to be patient when I'm stuck in a rut  . 
• Be less shy and speak up ~ my blushing always gives it away! not good when you're talking to patients. sighh..
• Lose more weight
• Enjoy this year before it's gone : )

Prepare to meet your doom

Current status ~ study mode

Target ~ kill musculoskeletal and blow its brains out in tomorrows test OR(according to a good friend)rape the paper till it screams your name !!

Comrades ~ other fellow pharmacy students 


get ready to meet your doom musculoskeletal !!